(James 1:26; Matthew 5:37)

by the Rev. Canon Tony Baron

Although nothing is intrinsically good about not talking, it seems to me the abundance of words has violated humanity—by keeping the pastor from being fully human. Our church battles, often evident by internal power struggles and competitive intimidation, only affirm the lack of genuine listening, and the need, at times, for silence. The Church has frequently followed the model of word proliferation with corporate-speak in order to entice the congregation or a staff member to look better or do more in the name of Christ. Silence, in “kingdom of the world” language, often means nothing advantageous is being accomplished. Scan the radio dial or the television stations, and you will hear an abundance of words filled with nonsensical interplay: frivolous banter, harmful gossip or inaccurate spin-doctoring of opinion.

Henri Nouwen, in skillful precision, puts it this way:

Over the last few decades we have been inundated by a torrent of words. Wherever we go we are surrounded by words: words softly whispered, loudly proclaimed, or angrily screamed; words spoke, recited, or sung; words on records, in books, on walls, or in the sky; words in many sounds, many colors, or many forms; words to be heard, read, seen, or glanced at; words which flicker off and on, move slowly, dance, jump, or wiggle. Words, words, words! They form the floor, the walls, and the ceiling of our existence” (Nouwen, The Way of the Heart, p. 45).

Later, Nouwen, in that same chapter entitled, “Our Wordy World,” describes his bizarre impression while driving in Los Angeles as entering a “huge dictionary.” He writes:

Where I looked there were words trying to take my eyes from the road. They said, Use me, take me, buy me, drink me, smell me, touch me, kiss me, sleep with me. In such a world who can maintain respect for words (Nouwen, ibid, pp. 45-46)?

Indeed, because of the abundance of words, they no longer have the same impact. The lack of power in words requires the word-seller to focus on the technique of consumer rhetoric, attempting to entice the hearer or incite the reader to action. Sizzle replaces substance. Code words replace honest conversations. Opinions replace truth. The abundance of words numbs the soul, confuses the mind and paralyzes the feet from a focused life.

Life is best lived in intimacy. It seems to me that the best kind of life is one intentionally engaged in a deeper relationship with others, oneself and God. However, the roadblocks to achieving this dream are often self-inflicted by the little organ we call the tongue. The words we speak to others, self and God often more accurately reflect past debris and present distractions than serve to enhance genuine intimacy. Although I have been deeply formed by significant relationships over the years, I am now certain that those relationships would have been more profound if I had spent more time listening than talking. Truth is the first casualty of the abundance of words.

So here is your call to action. Try silence as a tool to be a better shepherd. Seek to listen first. Don’t feel the need to add the last word on the subject. Listening is in short supply in the world today. Most people aren’t used to being listened to anymore. So set aside a day (make arrangements with your personal assistant and staff so they don’t think you are crazy) where you listen without speaking. You will actually learn more about your team, your church needs and yourself.

The Rev. Tony Baron is the Canon for Clergy and Congregational Care for C4SO.  Contact Tony here.